One day a man decided to retire.

He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank.

He soon found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts.

After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore.

In disbelief, he asks, “Where did you come from? How did you get here?

She replies, “I rowed over from the other side of the island where I landed when my cruise ship sank.

Amazing,” he notes. “You were really lucky to have a rowboat wash up with you.

“Oh, this thing?” explains the woman. ” I made the boat out of some raw material I found on the island. The oars were whittled from gum tree branches.

I wove the bottom from palm tree branches, and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree.

“But, where did you get the tools?

“Oh, that was no problem,” replied the woman. ” On the south side of the island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found that if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into ductile iron, and I used that to make tools and used the tools to make the hardware.

The guy is stunned.

“Let’s row over to my place,” she says “and I’ll give you a tour.” So, after a short time of rowing, she soon docks the boat at a small wharf. As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls off the boat.

Before him is a long stone walk leading to a cabin and tree house

While the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb struck. As they walk into the house, she says casually, “It’s not much, but I call it home. Please sit down.

“Would you like a drink?

“No! No thank you,” the man blurts out, still dazed. “I can’t take another drop of coconut juice.

“Oh, it’s not coconut juice,” winks the woman. “I have a still. How would you like a Tropical Spritz?

Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts, and they sit down on her couch to talk. After they exchange their individual survival stories, the woman announces, ” I’m going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and shave? There’s a razor in the bathroom cabinet upstairs.

No longer questioning anything, the man goes upstairs into the bathroom. There, in the cabinet is a razor made from a piece of tortoise bone. Two shells honed to a hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end inside a swivel mechanism.

“This woman is amazing,” he muses. “What’s next?

When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but some small flowers on tiny vines, each strategically positioned, she smelled faintly of gardenias. She then beckons for him to sit down next to her.

“Tell me,” she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, “We’ve both been out here for many months.  You must have been lonely.  When was the last time you played around? She stares into his eyes.

He can’t believe what he’s hearing. “You mean…” he swallows excitedly as tears start to form in his eyes, “You’ve built a Golf Course too?

ED: From my inbox – Thanks Neil

The Australian Tunnel Rats were members of Engineer Field Troops serving in Vietnam. This included 3 Field Troop and 1, 2, and 3 Troops of 1 Field Squadron, Royal Australian Engineers. While a few soldiers were ‘lucky enough’ to encounter extensive enemy tunnel systems, every member of the Field Troops took turns in the underground tunnels to search, clear, and destroy enemy bunkers. Many of these bunkers were interconnected by small tunnels. In large operations, it was common for the sappers to destroy over 100 enemy bunkers.

3 Field Troop was the first Australian engineer unit deployed to Vietnam in support of the 1st Battalion, Royal Australian Regiment. In January 1965, they participated in Operation Crimp in the Ho Bo Woods, part of the notorious ‘Iron Triangle’. Their initial task was expected to involve road clearing, de-mining, and destroying enemy facilities or caches located by infantry. However, the discovery of tunnel entrances quickly changed their role.

One particular entrance became infamous when an enemy soldier used it to kill two Australian soldiers and wound two others. Despite lacking training for tunnel exploration and the obvious dangers, volunteers from 3 Field Troop entered the 60cm wide and 75cm high tunnels armed with only a flashlight, bayonet, and immense courage. Though the tunnels had been evacuated, they uncovered valuable intelligence, marking the beginning of their unexpected role as Tunnel Rats. Surprisingly, despite extensive tunnel experience from the French War and US Army explorations, no operational techniques or lessons were passed on to the Australian Field Engineers, leaving them untrained and unprepared for this dangerous task.

(Piture: Pte Keith Mills 3 Field Troop) On the fourth day of the operation, tragedy struck when Corporal Bob Bowtell, a 184cm tall non-commissioned officer, attempted to enter a tunnel. His large size prevented air from circulating, causing him to suffocate. Several of his rescuers narrowly avoided the same fate. Over the course of six days, the troop suffered six asphyxiation casualties, including one death and five injuries, due to what was referred to as ‘bad air’ in the tunnels. This likely resulted from remnants of tear gas and smoke that had been pumped into the tunnels using their newly issued ‘Mighty Mite’ blower system. Without proper re-oxygenation, the tunnels became dangerous for those who entered.

Despite this harrowing experience, none of the sappers refused to continue entering tunnels when required. However, after six days, the troop was withdrawn and redeployed to Bien Hoa and later to Nui Dat to assist in establishing the operational base for the 1st Australian Task Force. The true extent of the tunnel system remained unexplored, even though it was later revealed that it served as the command headquarters for operations against Saigon, Bien Hoa, and the surrounding provinces.

While much of their work involved tunnel clearance, the sappers also spent significant time above ground, defusing booby traps, clearing paths through minefields, and acting as infantrymen during enemy contact. Additionally, they took on engineering tasks like repairing roads and bridges, as well as upgrading base facilities, leading to an exceptionally busy and diverse workload.

As their tour of duty came to an end, the sappers turned their focus to documenting the techniques they had developed and establishing training protocols for future troops who would follow in their footsteps, navigating the dark, confined tunnels on hands and knees.

Though clearing tunnels remained hazardous, the majority of the 35 sappers who died in Vietnam or the 200 who were wounded suffered injuries in mine-related incidents rather than tunnel operations. This equated to a 36% casualty rate among highly skilled young soldiers. Between 1965 and 1971, five Military Medals (MM) and one Military Cross (MC) were awarded. Given the high-risk nature of their work and significant casualty rates, this under-recognition is more a reflection of the limited distribution of awards than the valour and experiences of the Tunnel Rats.

The Navy faces a growing threat from China, whose numerical superiority is increasing every year. To meet this challenge, the US Navy is heavily upgrading its destroyers with laser weapons and is ready to introduce a next-generation warship with previously unseen capabilities. Let’s find out what it is!

The Australian Institute of Health and Welfare (AIHW) has published its latest report into deaths by suicide of current and former serving ADF members who have served at least one day in the ADF since 1 January 1985.

The Serving and ex-serving Australian Defence Force members who have served since 1985 suicide monitoring: 1997 to 2022 report found that there were 1763 certified deaths by suicide between January 1997 and December 2022.

DVA commissioned AIHW to undertake this research to improve our understanding of this complex issue and find ways to better support those in need.

Any veteran or Defence member’s death by suicide is a tragedy which the whole community feels deeply.

The Australian Government is committed to addressing the ongoing impact of service and preventing future deaths by suicide. The reports from the Royal Commission into Defence and Veteran Suicide are critical to understanding and addressing the causes of deaths by suicide.

There are a range of services and supports available to those who need them. All current and former serving members of the ADF who have completed one day of full-time service (and some reservists) are eligible for fully funded mental health treatment through the Non-Liability Health Care program. Proof your condition is related to military service isn’t required to access treatment.

If you’re a veteran, the immediate family member of a veteran or know someone in the veteran community struggling with their mental health, please encourage them to reach out for support:

• Defence personnel can contact their local health centre, the All Hours Support Line on 1800 628 036 or the Defence Member and Family Helpline on 1800 624 608.
• Open Arms – Veterans & Families Counselling Service provides free and confidential mental health support available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year for veterans and their immediate families on 1800 011 046.

To read the findings of the report, visit AIHW suicide report

Veterans and families are encouraged to be on the lookout for third-party organisations making false or misleading claims that they are working on behalf of the Department of Veterans’ Affairs (DVA), or any other Australian Government department. DVA is aware that some third-party organisations are trying to access funding via our clients.

As a DVA client you will have access to a range of health care services and programs designed to support your physical and mental health and wellbeing.

You may be contacted by people falsely claiming to represent a DVA approved service provider and suggesting you use their services.

We encourage all veterans and families to be wary of any advertisements or other representations made by third-party organisations – especially when they claim to be doing so on behalf of DVA, or with our approval.

Signs of a false or misleading representation

• Being offered vouchers, discounts or other gifts
  We will never directly send you unsolicited goods, such as retail vouchers or gifts.
• Being offered unsolicited health-related services
  We will never offer you or your family any health-related services without your consent.
• Being asked to call a random phone number to talk in more detail
  If someone contacts you claiming to be from DVA and asks you call a random number, you can call us direct on 1800 VETERAN (1800 838 372) to check the validity of their claim.

If you suspect false or misleading representation

If you receive a phone call but are not sure if you’re speaking to a genuine DVA staff member, or if you suspect a third-party may be misrepresenting DVA – hang up and call us directly on 1800 VETERAN (1800 838 372). You can check the validity of any emails or letters you have received by phoning the same number.

You can also request a call back by using MyService or submit a general enquiry form at our website https://www.dva.gov.au/form/general-enquiries.

The Prime Minister proudly announced a drop in inflation for August, pointing to official figures as proof that the government is successfully tackling the cost of living crisis. According to the Australian Bureau of Statistics, annual headline inflation dropped from 3.5% to 2.7%, with underlying inflation falling from 3.8% to 3.4%. But this apparent victory comes with a significant caveat: the situation is far more nuanced than the Prime Minister is willing to admit.

Economists have been quick to point out that the much-touted 2.7% inflation figure doesn’t tell the full story. It’s largely an illusion, bolstered by temporary government measures such as energy rebates. When these one-off measures are stripped away, the real inflation rate remains closer to 3.5%. This indicates that the underlying economic pressures are still very much in play. The Prime Minister’s claim, while technically accurate, obscures the broader reality that Australians are still grappling with rising costs on essential goods and services.

What’s more troubling is the Prime Minister’s apparent disregard for the cautionary tone set by economic experts and the Reserve Bank of Australia (RBA). The RBA has made it clear that a sustainable reduction in inflation within the target range of 2% to 3% is necessary before any relief in interest rates can be expected. Governor Michele Bullock emphasized on Tuesday that the central bank remains firm on its inflation target, choosing to hold the cash rate at 4.35%. Yet, when asked directly whether he believed the RBA governor was wrong in her approach, the Prime Minister sidestepped the question, offering little insight into whether his government sees eye to eye with the central bank on monetary policy.

Instead, the Prime Minister reverted to well-worn talking points about the government’s actions to ease cost-of-living pressures: energy bill relief, tax cuts, fee-free TAFE, and cheaper childcare. While these initiatives might offer short-term relief, they fail to address the underlying inflationary pressures. This lack of substantive engagement with the issue leaves Australians wondering if the Prime Minister truly understands the complexity of the problem. His unwillingness to engage with the nuanced realities of inflation risks creating a false sense of security, when in fact the economy remains under considerable strain.

Moreover, the government’s focus on feel-good measures like wage increases and tax cuts does little to address the structural challenges driving inflation. The real test lies in achieving sustainable growth while keeping inflation within the RBA’s target range. Until that is achieved, any celebration of lower inflation numbers is premature and misleading.

In essence, the Prime Minister’s attitude reflects a concerning lack of depth in addressing one of the most pressing economic issues facing the country today. By downplaying the complexities and ignoring the voices of economic experts, he risks painting an overly rosy picture of a situation that is far from resolved. Australians deserve transparency and genuine solutions, not half-truths and political spin.

Australia’s new UH-60M Black Hawk utility helicopters have undertaken flight trials and procedures on board Royal Australian Navy vessels on the South Coast of NSW.

During the testing, an Australian Army UH-60M Black Hawk was carried aboard multi-role aircraft training vessel MV Sycamore in Jervis Bay during late August this year.

The first-of-class flight trials included deck operations, refuelling, stowage via deck lashing, deck take-off and landings.

“Defence has completed first-of-class flight trials for Australian Army’s new UH-60M utility helicopters to develop and confirm procedures required for a new type of aircraft to operate to and from an Australian Navy ship,” Defence said.

“The trial includes assessments of the aircraft’s suitability for operating off the deck, its integration with ship’s aviation facilities, and determining the limitations placed on an aircraft for shipboard operations.

“Forty UH-60M Black Hawk utility helicopters are being delivered to the Australian Army under Project Land 4507 UH-60M Black Hawk Utility Helicopter.

“Defence anticipates initial operating capability for the UH-60M Black Hawk will be achieved by the end of 2024. All 40 [Black Hawk] aircraft are scheduled for delivery by 2029.”

Earlier this year, the latest pair of new UH-60M Black Hawk helicopters arrived in Sydney aboard a United States Air Force C17 Globemaster III aircraft at RAAF Base Richmond.

Australia will acquire 40 UH-60M Black Hawk helicopters for the Australian Army, under a 2023 foreign military sales case with the United States.

Each UH-60M utility helicopter can reportedly support 9,979 kilograms in maximum gross weight and 12 fully equipped, seated troops. Other versions include combat assault, medical evacuation, aerial firefighting, search and rescue, special operations, and VIP transport.

1. Light travels faster than sound.  This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

2. A fine is a tax for doing wrong.  A tax is a fine for doing well.

3. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

4.  A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

5.  Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

6. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don’t.

8. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong. 

9. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end-to-end, someone from Florida would be stupid enough to try to pass them.

10. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

11. The things that come to those who wait, may be the things left by those who got there first.

12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

13. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

14. God gave you toes as a device for finding furniture in the dark.

15. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of twelve people, who weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty.  

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Cheers

Ray