Australia Day in Verse.

The flag has been hoisted, it flutters on high

This always brings a tear to my eye

Some say our flag needs to be changed

I believe those people are totally deranged

Along with the date-change bullies

And the virtue signalling mob at Woolies

Some are on this earth to complain

Where we see sunshine, they see rain

I cleaned the Barbie, forks and tongs

And put on my trusty well worn thongs

Rugger shorts and a singlet top

And plenty of sunscreen Slip Slap Slop

I mowed a strip for the backyard cricket

And grabbed a wheelie bin for a wicket

I managed to get the kids on side

By rigging a temporary water slide

I dragged some chairs under the trees

The bureau is predicting forty degrees

The esky is loaded with champers and beer

Time for a coldie before the mob gets here

While waiting for the guests to show

Our Kiwi neighbour said “Greetings Bro “

“The mussus and kuds are on their way

We’ll help you celebrate Australia Day.”

Time to play games to soak up the beer

Winning shots are greeted by jubilant cheers

The girls watched on; but disowned the boys

Who carried on like kids with new toys

The backyard cricket was declared a draw

After it descended into total uproar

Batsman Kiwi Bob lost his calm

When Gazza decided to bowl underarm

Openly gay, and very good looking

Tony has offered to do all the cooking

Asif and Mustafa from the Middle East

Have prepared an enormous exotic feast

Prawns, burgers lamb chops and snags

Under the weight of this fare the table sags

The Middle Eastern food was a new taste treat

But Kiwi Bob says a Hangi is hard to beat

Indigenous Dave is an interstate trucker

He surprised us with authentic bush tucker

While Vietnamese friends, bless their souls

Brought a big plate of rice paper rolls

After lunch and the booze had kicked in

It was time for the karaoke to begin

The National Anthem, in patriotic roar

Pity the poor neighbours next door

The setting sun marks the end of a great day

The girls want to leave, the blokes want to stay

It’s not hard to guess who’ll win that debate

Though nine o’clock is hardly late

I guess that the knockers will feel that they won

By refusing to embrace it and join in the fun

My message to them is loud and clear

Wake up and get onboard next year.